If you are in a depressed state, aware of the perishability of being, worried and thinking about your own imperfection, do not worry - this is temporary. And if your emotional state is in balance and nothing disturbs you, do not flatter yourself - it may not be for long.
All human life consists of numerous psycho-physiological periods, each of which is characterized by certain emotional levels. The end of each period is fraught with a psychological crisis of age. This is not a diagnosis, it is part of life, age-related psychophysiological characteristics of a person. Forewarned is forearmed. It is easy to overcome the crisis of age by understanding what exactly is happening in the body at one time or another.
Age and age characteristics
From birth to death, a person goes through many stages of personality development. The human psyche changes, rebuilds and develops throughout life. A person lives both emotionally stable periods and crisis stages of personality development, which are characterized by unstableemotional background.
Psychologists gradually describe age-related psychological characteristics. The most obvious changes associated with the mental development of personality in childhood and adolescence. This period is characterized by the most striking bursts of emotional instability. Such periods are usually associated with a crisis of age. But do not be afraid of the terrible word "crisis". Usually such a difficult and emotionally unstable period ends with a qualitative leap in development in childhood, and an adult overcomes another step on the way to the formation of a mature personality.
Stable period and age crisis
Both a stable period of development and a crisis nature are characterized by qualitative changes in personality. Stable psycho-emotional stages are characterized by a long duration. Such periods of calm usually end with a qualitative positive leap in development. The personality changes, and new acquired skills and knowledge remain for a long time, often not crowding out those already formed earlier.
Crisis is a natural event in the psycho-emotional state of a person. Under adverse conditions, such periods can stretch up to 2 years. These are short but turbulent stages of personality formation, which also bring new changes in character and behavior. What is meant by unfavorable conditions affecting the duration of the crisis period? First of all, these are incorrectly built relations "man - society". Negationsurrounding the new needs of the individual. Crisis periods in the development of children should be especially noted here.
Parents and educators often focus on children's difficult education during critical periods of their development.
"I don't want to, I won't!" Can the crisis be avoided?
Psychologists say that the vivid manifestations of the critical period are not a problem of a child, but of a society that is not ready to change behavior. Age characteristics of children are formed from birth and change throughout life under the influence of education. The formation of the child's personality takes place in society, which has a direct impact on the psycho-emotional development of the individual. Childhood crises are often associated with socialization. It is impossible to avoid a crisis as such, but properly built child-adult relationships help to reduce the duration of this period.
The infancy crisis arises from the baby's inability to meet its new needs. At 2 or 3 years old, he is aware of his independence and seeks to make decisions independently. But due to his age, he cannot reasonably assess the situation or is not able to physically perform some action. An adult comes to the rescue, but this causes a clear protest on the part of the baby. You tell the child to go on a level road, and he deliberately climbs into puddles or mud. When you suggest going home, the child runs off to chase the pigeons. All attempts to pull the blanket over yourself end in childish tantrums and tears.
No way out?
During such periods, it seems to all parents that the child does not hear them, and frequent negative emotional outbursts unsettle. At times like this, it's important to save face, no matter how difficult it may be, and remember that you are the only adult in this situation and only you can build constructive communication.
What to do? Response to children's tantrums
If a child seeks to make decisions on his own, it is worth helping him make an adequate choice. What to do if a tantrum occurs? It is not always necessary to rush headlong to comfort a child, promising him mountains of gold in exchange for peace and tranquility. Of course, at first this will be the fastest way to end the tantrum, and in the future it will lead to elementary blackmail on the part of the child. Children very quickly learn to understand cause and effect relationships, so when they realize why they suddenly get sweets or a toy, they will demand it by screaming.
Of course, you can't ignore the child's feelings, but in some cases you can calmly explain that such behavior is his own choice, and if he is comfortable in this state, so be it. Often, age-related features in the form of whims and tantrums of children aged 2-3 years are a test of strength, a search for the boundaries of permissibility, and it is important to clearly define these boundaries, thereby not depriving the child of the right to choose. He can sit in the middle of the street and cry or go with his parents to see where that blue truck has gone, it's his choice. At the age of 2-3 yearsyou can delegate elementary household chores to your baby: sort out a shopping bag, feed a pet, or bring cutlery. This will help the child adequately perceive their independence.
Major critical periods in early childhood development
The first critical period in early childhood occurs in newborns. It's called the neonatal crisis. This is a natural stage in the development of a new person who is suddenly faced with a catastrophic change in environmental conditions. Helplessness, coupled with awareness of one's own physical life, contributes to stress for a small organism. Usually, the first weeks of a child's life are characterized by weight loss - this is a consequence of stress due to global changes in conditions and a complete restructuring of the body. The main task to be solved by the child in the critical period of his development (the neonatal crisis) is to gain confidence in the world around him. And the world for the crumbs of the first months of life is, first of all, his family.
A baby expresses its needs and feelings through crying. This is the only way of communication available to him in the first months of life. All age periods are characterized by a certain set of needs and ways of expressing these needs. There is no need to reinvent the wheel, trying to understand what a 2-month-old baby needs and why he is crying. The neonatal period is characterized by only basic primary needs: food, sleep, comfort, warmth, he alth, cleanliness. Part of the needs of a childis able to satisfy on its own, but the main task of an adult is to provide conditions for meeting all the necessary needs of the baby. The first crisis period ends with the emergence of attachment. Using the example of the neonatal crisis, it can be clearly explained that all the features of behavior and emotional state in certain periods of life are due to the emergence as a result of a qualitative neoplasm. A newborn baby goes through many stages of accepting himself and his body, calls for help, he realizes that he gets what he needs, expressing emotions, and learns to trust.
Crisis of the first year
Age and individual characteristics of a person are formed under the influence of society and depend on the skills of communicating with the outside world. In the first year of life, the child begins to communicate with the environment, learns certain boundaries. The level of his needs increases, and the way he achieves his goals changes accordingly.
There is a gap between desires and the way they are expressed. This is the reason for the beginning of the critical period. The child must learn language to meet new needs.
Crisis of three years
Age characteristics of a three-year-old child are associated with the formation of personality and own will. This difficult period is characterized by disobedience, protests, stubbornness and negativism. The child is aware of the conditionality of the designated boundaries, understands his indirect connection with the world and actively manifests his "I".
But this critical period plays a very important rolerole in the ability to form your goals and find adequate ways to achieve them.
Human development is not a spontaneous and far from spasmodic process, but a completely uniform flow subject to reasonable management and self-regulation. Age characteristics of children and adults depend on the results of communication with the outside world and with oneself. The reason for the occurrence of critical periods is the incorrect completion of a stable period of personality development. A person comes to the stage of completing one period with certain needs and goals, but cannot understand what to do with it. There is an internal contradiction.
Can critical periods be avoided? Speaking of crisis prevention in childhood, it is worth paying attention to the zone of proximal development. What does this mean?
One step ahead
In the learning process, it is worth highlighting the level of actual and potential development. The level of the actual development of the child is determined by his ability to perform certain actions independently without outside help. This applies to simple everyday issues, and to tasks related to intellectual activity. The principle of the zone of proximal development is the emphasis on the level of potential development of the child. This level implies that the child is able to decide in cooperation with adults. A similar principle of learning will help to expand the boundaries in its development.
Theoretically and practically, this method can be used by adults. After all, critical periods are characteristic of allages.
Children's spontaneity, youthful maximalism, senile grouchiness - all these age-related features of a person characterize critical periods of his development. At the age of 12-15, young people are very aggressively trying to climb a step higher, proving their maturity and stable worldview.
Negativism, protest, egocentrism are common age characteristics of schoolchildren.
The turbulent period of teenage maximalism, which is distinguished by the desire of a young person to take a more adult position, replaces the period of adulthood. And here comes either a long emotionally stable period, or another crisis associated with determining one's life path. This critical period has no clear boundaries. It can overtake a 20-year-old person, or it can suddenly complement midlife crises (and complicate them even more).
What do I want to be?
This is a question that many people cannot find the answer to throughout their lives. And an incorrectly chosen life path can negatively affect the awareness of one's destiny. A person does not always have complete control over his own destiny. We remember that a person will melt in the harsh conditions of the social environment.
The way of life is often also chosen for children by their parents. Some give freedom of choice, directing them in a certain direction, while others deprive their children of the right to vote, deciding their professional fate on their own. Neither the first nor the second case guarantees the avoidance of a critical period. Butaccepting one's own mistake is often easier than finding someone to blame for one's fiasco.
The cause of the critical period is often the wrong end of the previous period, the absence of a definite turning point. Using the example of the question “what do I want to become”, this is quite easy to explain and understand.
This question has been with us since childhood. It happens that knowing the exact answer, we are gradually moving towards achieving our goal and as a result we become what we dreamed of becoming in childhood: a doctor, teacher, businessman. If this desire is conscious, the satisfaction of the need for self-realization and, accordingly, self-satisfaction comes.
Further events will develop in a different plane - development in the profession, satisfaction or disappointment. But the main task of the period of growing up has been completed, and the crisis can be avoided.
But very often the question “who do I still want to become” can accompany a person for a very long time. And now, it would seem, the person has already grown up, but still has not decided. Numerous attempts at self-realization end unsuccessfully, but there is still no answer to the question. And this snowball, growing, rolls from one period to another, often exacerbating the crisis of 30 years and the crisis of midlife.
Crisis 30 years
The thirtieth birthday is a period when productivity in family relationships becomes the opposite of creative stagnation. At this age, it is common for a person to overestimate his satisfaction with personal andprofessional life. Often during this period, people get divorced or fired under the pretext of "capable of more" (remember the question "who do I want to be").
The main task of the critical period of 30 years is to subordinate your activity to the idea. Either firmly follow the intended goal in the chosen direction, or designate a new goal. This applies to both family life and professional activities.
When you are no longer young, but old age is not yet clapping on the shoulder, it's time to approach the reassessment of values. It's time to think about the meaning of life. The search for the main idea and predestination, maladjustment are the age-related features of the period of maturity.
Sometimes a person comes down from his pedestal to reconsider his ideas and goals, look back on the path and accept mistakes. During a critical period, a certain contradiction is resolved: a person either goes into the family circle, or goes beyond narrowly defined boundaries, showing interest in the fate of people outside the family circle.
The debriefing crisis
Old age is a time for summing up, integration and objective assessment of the passed stage. This is the most difficult stage, when there is a decrease in social status, a deterioration in physical condition. A person looks back and rethinks his decisions and actions. The main question to be answered is: “Am I satisfied?”
At different poles are people who accept their lives and theirdecisions, and those who experience resentment and dissatisfaction with the life they have lived. Often the latter project their dissatisfaction onto others. Old age is wise.
Two simple questions will help you make the right decisions in any critical period: “Who do I want to be?” and “Am I satisfied?” How it works? If the answer to the question “am I satisfied” is yes, then you are on the right track. If not, go back to the question “what do I want to be” and look for the answer.