Human society extols such a character trait as sacrifice. She is glorified, those who manifested her are set as an example to others, stories are written about her. But few people think about the fact that sacrifice is a word that hides many shades of good and evil.
Sacrifice - what is it
Sacrifice is a human trait, the owner of which is able to sacrifice something that belongs to him for the benefit of another person, or some cause.
It is generally accepted that only kind and sympathetic people are capable of sacrifice. But it is not always the case. Sometimes a person is obliged to do something to the detriment of his interests for the sake of a moral duty. The Church does not approve of this, calling for sacrifices from the heart, without expecting anything in return. But if the burden of sacrifice is morally great, it turns a blind eye to insincerity, allowing you to fulfill at least a moral duty, and the heart will respond anyway.
Synonyms for sacrifice
Synonyms are similar words that can replace the main word without losing the main essence. According to this statement, suitable words can be selected from the electronic dictionary of synonyms. Hearing them, any person will confirm that this is a sacrifice:
- Heroism.
- Dedication.
- Altruism.
- Dedication.
- Self-forgetfulness.
- Asceticism.
- Selflessness.
How women's sacrifice is manifested
For the first time, such a concept as female sacrifice was voiced by the American psychoanalyst Karen Horney. After analyzing many life stories, she came to the conclusion that women's inclination to sacrifice their interests for the benefit of the family stretches back from the childhood of a once-little girl.
It is unlikely that anyone thought about why in most families the place of the mistress of the house is occupied by an eternally dissatisfied woman who saws the nerves of her relatives. She works daily for the benefit of her relatives, washing, cleaning, preparing many dishes, but most often this is given at the cost of incredible fatigue. If we remember that many women also combine this with their main work, then one can only marvel at their strength and endurance. Women feel the same way and are therefore very offended when family members do not appreciate such a huge effort to ensure their comfort.
But if we delve into this question in more detail, what will happen if a woman rests after work, and without gritting her teeth begins to wash a mountain of dirty dishes? Or she goes shopping with her friends, while her husband looks after the children. Most women believe that no one else can do it except them. But in fact, thesefunctions can quite temporarily be taken over by one of the family members. Doing housework, they will appreciate women's work, and she can wait for those long-awaited words of gratitude.
But few women dare to do this. After interviewing some of them, Karen came to a surprising conclusion: they all share a subconscious sense of guilt. Loading themselves with the duties of the mistress of the house, they try to earn the forgiveness of their mother, who is often not even alive. All mothers united in themselves one image - this is an eternally busy woman, also loaded with household chores, but trying to control her family members in order to be aware of all affairs and correct what seems wrong to her.
A little girl, feeling pressure and constant control from her mother, tries to resist this, arranging tantrums and rebelling. But over time, learning to gradually become aware of her emotions, a feeling of guilt settles in her. After all, this is a mother and her daughter understands that it is wrong not to love her. But she can't help herself. Trying to fight internal emotions, she does everything to earn the love and encouragement of her mother. If this does not happen, the girl believes that she herself is to blame and apparently did not do enough. The girl grows up, but the guilt remains with her in many cases, walking hand in hand with her throughout her life.
Where does male sacrifice come from
Many centuries formed the tradition of male supremacy. It was the man who was considered the head of the family, it was from him that anysacrifices for those who care for him.
At the basis of all ethical considerations and patriarchal laws is a common biological principle. One man can impregnate many women in a short time, while one woman at a time can only bear one, sometimes two children in one pregnancy. Therefore, one man and several women are able to reproduce more people in their entire family life than one woman and several men.
While society needed a large number of people, no one disputed the supremacy of men. One man could do much more good for demographic growth than many women. But over time, the need for male supremacy disappeared by itself. The skew in society has leveled off, the number of people has increased, and women have ceased to spend most of their lives in a pregnant state.
But age-old statements still hold true today. Yes, the feminist movements have done their job, and modern women have much more rights and freedoms than before. But as before, a woman is expected to serve and obey her man for the good of the family. And from a man they expect sacrifices and patronage in everything: from the financial support of the family to sacrificing life for the sake of children.
The role of sacrifice in love
Society celebrates sacrificial love. Sacrifice in love is the willingness to forget about your feelings, or to give something very expensive for the benefit of a loved one.
This does not always mean the reunion of loving hearts, the creation of a new family and life to the grave. A lifesometimes it is so cruel that it puts a person before a choice: either the suffering of other people, but a happy life together, or the rejection of one's own feelings for the sake of someone else's well-being. This is the essence of sacrificial love. Such a test confirms that sometimes sacrifice is giving up something less for something more.
When this happens, a person needs to grow up. It is not easy to give up something dear to your heart, knowing that all the good fruits of this act will be reaped by strangers, and only a bitter residue will remain for yourself. But this is a necessary life stage that every person must go through on the path of growing up.
Sacrifice in the mother-child relationship
This is a painful issue in the lives of many families. Unfortunately, the practice of solving one's psychological problems at the expense of children is quite common. And most often it is women who do this:
- Give birth for yourself is a well-known option for those girls who cannot manage their personal lives. All unspent love and female energy, intended for a potential life partner, they transfer to a child. Often a single mother after childbirth no longer seeks to find a suitable man, devoting her whole life to the baby. But a child eventually becomes an adult. And the mother begins to overwhelm conflicting feelings. On the one hand, she wants the best for her blood, on the other hand, she does not want to share what has belonged to her for so many years. It is good if the mother has the wisdom to step aside and not interfere with the child to build his owna life. But if this does not happen, and she does not dare to let him go, then with one hundred percent probability it can be argued that she will break his fate.
- Living for a child is also a common scenario in the lives of many families. After the appearance of the baby, the woman focuses all her resources on him, often pushing aside her husband and other family members. And the child, called to become a continuation of love and family, becomes its center. It is in such cases that the husband's spree occurs in an attempt to get what is missing in the family on the side, or hard drinking, wanting to forget about problems. If the situation has reached a critical point, family breakup often occurs.
- A child as property is the fate of a baby born to a domineering and authoritarian mother. Wanting to control his every breath, a woman radically changes his fate, adjusting to her needs. But you can't fool the universe. The woman realizes the desire to live her life again at the expense of the child, but she will have to pay for this with his unfortunate fate. She helped bring a new person into this world, but that didn't automatically make his life her property.
There are a lot of such life scenarios, only a part of the possible scenarios is presented above. Everything comes from the fact that not all women correctly understand the essence of maternal sacrifice.
The main role of the mother in the life of the child is to give him life and provide security while the new personality goes through all the stages of development. With that, her task is accomplished. A child can grow painlessly only in a full-fledged and loving family, where parents respect and loveeach other, supporting in difficult life situations. In this direction, a woman needs to direct all her inner strength and energy. And the child will pull himself up, taking an example from his parents.
