Family is the place where you can return at any time of the day or night, and be sure that you are welcomed here, loved and understood. It is especially important for children to have this confidence. After all, it is in the family that they acquire the skills and experience necessary for later life. In order for the child to be perfectly socially adapted, mentally and emotionally stable, and also successful in the future, both parents - mom and dad - must raise him. Only then will he be able to observe the correct pattern of relationships and determine the social roles of men and women in this world.
Unfortunately, incomplete families are becoming more and more common in Russia and in the world as a whole. This trend is steadily gaining momentum and threatens to completely replace the usual way of life, where the cell of society is at least three - mother, father and child.
Psychologists regard the upbringing of children in single-parent families as a big problem. After all, it is quite difficult for one of the parents to grow harmoniously.a developed personality with the right life orientations. Today, more than ever, there is a need to consider the characteristics of single-parent families and analyze their main problems.
Touch terminology
We are so used to talking about the family that we often do not even think about what exactly this definition means and what role it plays in the life of every person. In order to correctly understand the term "incomplete family", it is necessary to consider it from the point of view of psychology and sociology.
First of all, when experts start talking about the family as a whole, they mean by this word a certain group of people, which is a consciously organized cell, held together by common interests, duties and a sense of mutual responsibility. Members of the group lead a common life and consider self-reproduction to be the main purpose of existence.
As you can see, the classic definition of the familiar word "family" reveals its deep essence and purpose. Any union of a man and a woman should be sealed by the birth of children, which means that it is their upbringing that should be given more importance when planning to marry. Proceeding from this, the problems that a parent faces who, due to certain circumstances, are forced to raise a child alone, become clear.
Referring to the terminology, one can find out that an incomplete family is a group of people close by blood who are a parent and a child (several children). Such a model implies that all the main functions that are usually performed by the mother andfather, takes over one parent. He simultaneously bears social responsibility for the child, representing his interests as the main guardian - material, psychological, etc.
In the process of upbringing, children do not always receive the required degree of socialization, which manifests itself already at school age. If there is a psychologist and a social pedagogue in an educational institution, they will be able to draw the attention of the mother to emerging problems. Otherwise, in adolescence, they can worsen and cause a serious personality crisis. I would like to clarify that socialization is understood as the perception and assimilation of a set of behavioral norms, values, knowledge and similar factors that in the future determine how a person will interact with society.
Unfortunately, psychologists unanimously argue that single-parent families usually leave individuals who perceive society a little one-sidedly, and therefore in most cases they face a number of problems related to certain areas of life.
Classification
From the outside it may seem that all incomplete families are identical, but in fact they have a fairly broad classification. The main types of such a cell of society include the following:
- illegitimate;
- orphaned;
- divorced or broken up;
- maternal or paternal.
We will tell you more about each type listed above.
Sources of families with oneparent
In today's society, young people are less likely to seek to tie the knot. Psychologists note a frightening trend towards the creation of late marriages, which are formed when both partners reach a certain level of material prosperity. However, at the same time, the percentage of children born out of wedlock is high in society.
This is associated with a change in attitude towards relationships outside of marriage, sexual promiscuity and at the same time sexual illiteracy. Against this background, often at a young age, girls become single mothers, whose children will never know their fathers. In such families, it is very difficult for a child to obtain information about the social roles of men and women. Therefore, upbringing is often one-sided.
Orphaned family in terms of psychology is the most successful, so to speak, among the incomplete. Of course, the death of one of the parents becomes a huge test and grief for the child, from which it is very difficult to move away. Psychologically, children experience this blow for more than one year, and many try to cope with it up to the creation of their own family. But still, an orphaned incomplete family is an opportunity to successfully socialize in the future.
Depending on the age at which a child lost his mother or father, he has certain behavioral skills that help him contact the outside world. Even if grief came to the house when the youngest member of the family was very tiny, a positive image of the deceased parent will always be present in the family. You can turn to him in case of gaps in education,which is very important for the formation of a harmonious personality.
Divorced families make up the largest percentage of incomplete families. A feature of this type of family is the feeling of guilt, which becomes part of the life of the parent and child remaining in the family. The reasons for divorce are extremely numerous, but most often couples name alcoholism, bad character, treason, and so on. It is noteworthy that most often the application for divorce is filed by a woman. She is the initiator of the breakup of the family. However, in the future, it is she who feels abandoned, deceived and unnecessary.
Psychologists say that the main reason for divorce is the psychological immaturity of partners. They misinterpret the concept of "marriage", which means that they are almost 100% likely to face deceived expectations.
Also often in modern society, a family does not arise as a result of the mutual desire of a man and a woman, but as a result of the circumstances that forced this. This is understood as an unwanted pregnancy, which becomes a kind of foundation for the newly emerged family. Unfortunately, it is rather fragile, and after three to five years, or even earlier, such marriages break up. As a result, the percentage of incomplete families is increasing.
Usually children stay with their mothers. Therefore, as a result, a maternal family is formed. She is characterized by overprotection, with which a woman tries to compensate for the absence of a man in the house. Such upbringing leads to the fact that boys become infantile and hardly imagine what functions in the familya man must perform, and girls, on the contrary, are overly active and get used, following the example of their mother, to take full responsibility for their loved ones.
Paternal incomplete families are a certain rarity, but they are also found in society. Here, too, it is impossible to do without distortions in education. Sons in the absence of motherly love grow up cold and cynical, and daughters turn into spoiled and constantly demanding women.
In connection with the above, the reader may want to ask the question of what incomplete family can be considered harmonious. Unfortunately, one parent cannot compensate for the absence of the other. In a family, the roles of father and mother are not interchangeable, and the contribution of both parents to the upbringing of their offspring is valuable precisely in the aggregate.
Of course, no one will argue that raising a child in an incomplete family is doomed to failure. However, the absence of a second parent will always be felt by children and leave a noticeable imprint on their personality.
Statistics in brief
Statistics of incomplete families today is of interest to many public figures. After all, it is one of the most striking indicators of the state of society. According to the latest data, the number of families where children are raised by one parent has increased by 30%. If we translate this number into numbers, we get approximately six and a half million families. Moreover, the vast majority of them are maternal. More than half of women complain that they receive alimony irregularly. And every third mother does not receive material assistance at all from the father of the child and completelyindependently supports his child.
Paternal incomplete families in modern Russia make up approximately 0.1 of their total number. This is also quite a lot and indicates that there has been a significant devaluation of marriage and everything connected with it in society.
At the same time, there is a high percentage of incomplete families moving into the category of crisis ones. This trend is associated with a huge number of problems that arise in such cells of society in the vast majority.
It is noteworthy that the number of single-parent large families out of the total number is about 10 thousand. In them, one parent brings up from three to five children. This cannot be done without certain subsidies and benefits. For single-parent families, state support is very important, and this applies to both ordinary and large social groups.
Problems of single-parent families: classification
Every family has a lot of problems, but in situations where children have to be raised alone by a mother or father, they appear brighter and lead to more serious consequences.
All the problems faced by families of the category of interest to us can be summarized as the following list:
- educational;
- medical;
- social;
- economic.
The last two points are often combined into one and considered together. This is because economic difficulties lead to social problems and vice versa.
A few words about educationalprocess
The upbringing of children from incomplete families proceeds with a number of features and can be considered specific. The main functions of the traditional unit of society are the preservation and transmission of traditions, experience, values and moral norms. All this is possible only within the framework of living in one territory of several generations of blood relatives.
It would be ideal to raise a child together with grandparents, but if this is not possible, then the adult generation should be represented by a married couple. In this case, a group of people goes through several stages of development necessary for the harmonious maturation of its younger members.
But in an incomplete family, the older generation is represented by only one person, so it loses a certain balance and harmony. As a result, the scheme is violated, in which one part of the group provides material benefits and spiritual needs, while the other receives them in the required amount. Trying to fully fulfill all the functions of both parents, the mother or father experiences great overload. This cannot but affect education. Children from single-parent families often say that they would like to see their loved ones more often and complain about the lack of attention.
Unfortunately, the educational process in such cells of society proceeds according to two scenarios. In the first, the mother, namely, she most often stays with the child, tries to spend all her energy on work. She strives to make sure that her child does not need anything. However, to do this, she has to carry a double load or take on several jobs at the same time.
She can fully cope with her task as a breadwinner in the family, but she cannot fully control her child. He is left without due attention and feels abandoned and unnecessary. To get rid of guilt, the mother tries to fully satisfy the material needs of her son or daughter. As a result, children form the wrong idea about love and care, which in later life will become the only model of behavior.
In the second scenario of upbringing, the mother throws all her strength into the development of her child and looking after him. The money available in the family is spent on all kinds of circles and sections, where the mother again accompanies the child. In almost all cases, her word is decisive, and interference in the life of a child takes ugly and hypertrophied forms.
As a result of such upbringing, children grow up completely unsuitable to exist separately from the parent, but in parallel, types may arise that strive to leave their home with all their might. In adolescence, this can lead to a real rebellion.
He alth of single parent children
Incomplete family in the social support of the state is in dire need. After all, the problems of such cells of society primarily affect the he alth of the younger generation. With all the desire to give their child all the best, mothers who are forced to work hard and hard can not always notice that the child needs to be taken to the doctor.
Many, left without the help of a second spouse, simply do not havefree time and try to treat children at home. This often leads to the fact that the disease passes into a latent and chronic stage. And in some situations, it even progresses. Thus, children in single-parent families are more likely to relapse colds and viral diseases that occur with multiple complications.
There are also categories of families that deliberately avoid going to the doctor. They simply do not have the necessary funds to buy medicines or pay for examinations. Despite the fact that medicine in our state is free, doctors often refer a child to paid procedures. Naturally, families where the income consists only of the earnings of one adult cannot afford this. As a result, until the moment when the situation gets out of control and becomes critical, children do not end up in a medical facility. Naturally, this does not contribute to the he alth of the child.
Socio-economic problems: poverty
A family where the baby is raised by both parents usually has a higher income, as it consists of the earnings of the father and mother. In the event of a divorce or other reason that led to the dissolution of the marriage union, financial responsibility falls on the shoulders of one family member. And, unfortunately, often it becomes a woman. Even with a great desire to earn money, she fails to fully compensate for the financial gap that has arisen in the budget. This is due to many reasons.
KThe main reason is the lower earnings of women compared to men. Despite the fact that in our country many women successfully work in typically male positions, it is extremely difficult for the majority to provide for the daily needs and needs of children alone.
It is also worth considering that child support received from the father of the children cannot cover even half of the costs of the child. At the same time, there is a high percentage of draft dodgers who, for several years, have absolutely not helped their ex-wives raise children financially.
Many mothers also face the problem of finding employment. Having a child in her arms and in the absence of support from the second parent, a woman is forced to be very picky about her position. She has to forego shift schedules, travel options, and irregular hours.
Employers also do not seek to take single mothers into the company. After all, they need a full social package, which they plan to actively use. This is not suitable for everyone. Therefore, in an incomplete family, adults regularly face financial difficulties.
Characterize families in terms of we alth
We have already talked about poverty, and it is worthwhile to understand that all single-parent families face it to one degree or another. But sometimes they have to exist for some period of time without income due to insurmountable reasons. In this case, the state can provide assistance to single-parent families. It will provide a range of benefits for the unemployed adult and the child he/she is raising. Of course theythe amount cannot provide a decent standard of living, but it can still provide an opportunity to survive difficult times.
Specialists divide most single-parent families into two categories:
- poor;
- dependent.
The former have a total income that remains below the established consumer basket. Social services and guardianship authorities need to work with such families.
In dependent single-parent families, benefits and various benefits account for approximately a quarter of income. This gives them the opportunity to exist, but does not allow them to rise to a new level of life.
Social Issues
As you already understood, social problems are very closely related to the economic difficulties experienced by the family. First of all, these are problems with the socialization of the child. Abruptly losing one of the parents and a certain status, which is important in the children's team, as well as experiencing an acute shortage of money, the child can become uncontrollable. It is not uncommon for an obedient and calm kid to turn into a bully and a thunderstorm for the whole school. It is extremely difficult for one mother to cope with such a situation, and she needs to involve other family members, including the older generation, whenever possible.
Social problems also include the relationship between mother and child. Unfortunately, in incomplete families, they are often far from ideal. Children tend to shift the blame for the separation of their parents and, under this burden, begin to behave in a way that is unusual for them. And the tired mothersfrom problems and worries, they often take out their anger on their child, which clearly does not contribute to establishing contact. Thus, people who cease to understand each other and lose the concept of intimacy live in the same territory.
Conclusion
It is not easy to list all the problems of incomplete families. After all, each situation is still individual, and it must be considered taking into account a host of additional factors. Psychologists advise the parent left with the child not to try to overcome all the hardships alone. Be active and involve relatives, psychologists, various charitable organizations in your life and communicate with families who find themselves in a similar situation. This will give you strength and help to partially solve financial difficulties.
